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I Blame Omarosa. And Maybe Jerry Springer

I seem to be addicted to television shows featuring foul-mouthed men with British accents.  It’s the only way I can explain how a marathon of House can lull me to sleep better than the sweetest lullaby, why Ricky Gervais podcasts dominated the radio during a very long road trip, and why I watch every single show Gordon Ramsay comes up with.  Masterchef has ended, but I still have the F Word, Kitchen Nightmares on BBC and returning to Fox soon, and of course Hell’s Kitchen.  Last night I fought slumber to watch the final 5 become 4 on Hell’s Kitchen.  A few weeks ago, I expected Jennifer and Will to make it to the final 2, but sadly Jennifer took the long and lonely walk out of the kitchen instead of Elise.  If not for the fact that I’d been up since before 5am that morning, I would have thrown the remote through the television set when Elise was sent back to the other three chefs, safe yet again after conning the boys into “having her back” during elimination.

Elise embodies every horrible characteristic you can put into a reality show character, or person in general for that matter.  She’s smug, obnoxiously loud, has zero consideration for people around her because she’s “playing the game,” is beyond lazy, a total shit-starter, and a liar who forgets everything she does there is filmed.  Her time seems to be up, yet she remains on the show.  Last night her high-priced creation (which included macaroni and cheese, because that’s what we all picture on a $30+ dollar meal) was compared to something a dog chewed up, plus she ruined hundred of dollars worth of salmon during dinner service due to ignoring advice and help.  She picks fights with everyone who doesn’t kiss her ass.  She refuses to assist during punishments (cleaning, redecorating, kitchen prep, etc).  She cost her team a few challenges by allowing her personal vendettas control decisions rather than actual talent.  Speaking of talent, I don’t believe she has enough, as she constantly has to ask if she’s cooking things properly.  She’s a waste of space.

She remains on the show for the same reason MTV stuck a gay person and a racist on every season of the Real World before it became a show about how many people can bone in 45 minutes.  The same reason Trading Spouses and Wife Swap takes two totally opposite families to switch lives for a week.  Elise is a pain in the ass, but she’s a pain that attracts viewers, generates discussion, and raises ratings.  I’ll admit, it would make for boring reality television if everyone got along and all was well 24/7.  Conflict is interesting and it’s something we can all relate to, as I’m sure none of us are lucky enough to live drama-free lives.  Maybe we like to see other people suffer or maybe it’s just simple entertainment, but the drama is definitely a selling point with the TV audience.

Producers know we love it and they love to milk it for all it’s worth.  That fight pictured above was nothing more than a bunch of yelling and furniture throwing which ended when Mike slammed his own head into a wall.  Not what the audience expected, considering every preview leading up to it edited the events in such a way that it seemed Ronnie had nearly taken Mike’s head off with one of his steroid-filled fists.  Hell’s Kitchen’s previews are now always filled with Elise and her spiteful glances at her fellow chefs, her ugly comments (when she’s not shouting), and her smug one-on-one interviews.  I tuned in last night instead of going to bed and catching it on DVR later because I was SURE that last night would be her last time cooking in that kitchen.  Well done, producers, you got me.

The winner of Hell’s Kitchen becomes the head chef of BLT Steak in New York.  This is an honor that can not go to Elise, who confuses yelling at the top of her lungs with good communication and strong leadership.  She’s a cancer in the kitchen and has proven herself to be incapable of receiving constructive criticism, being a team player, or working hard at all necessary tasks and not just the ones she feels like doing.  This show is about talent and leadership ability and she’s treating it like it’s one of the islands on Survivor.  Sorry Elise, you may be great for ratings and publicity, but you can’t be in charge and control a kitchen if you can’t even manage to control yourself.

GO

HOME

ELISE!

w

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About Jamie C. Baker

“Long time no see. I only pray the caliber of your questions has improved.” - Kevin Smith

Posted on September 13, 2011, in Crazy People, Food, TV/Movies and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink. Leave a comment.

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