He Is Dating WHO?
This morning, as my husband and I were driving to work and scanning through radio stations, we caught the middle of a conversation about Tim Tebow. Apparently, he is dating Camilla Belle, who the female DJ claimed enjoys preying on virgins. The DJ was mortified by this and incredibly upset, as Tebow is her future husband. Of course he is, darling. Of course he is.
She seemed to be absolutely livid about his dating choices, a reaction I’ve seen and heard from many people; on the radio or television gossip shows, in the office, from friends, and things overheard in public. It’s a sentiment I can identify with, but one I haven’t personally experienced since reaching adulthood and realizing that thinking Jared Leto would one day fall in love with me is beyond foolish and nothing more than a schoolgirl’s silly dream. It also came from realizing that the crush was based on a carefully marketed image and the bits of desirable personality from characters they played, the appeal of fame and being on a famous person’s arm, and other superficial things that have nothing to do with who a person truly is.
It’s silly to be happy that Taylor Swift is single again or depressed that Justin Timberlake is now married. These are people we don’t know and will either never meet or only meet in passing by luck or by chance. Even if we do manage to get a handful of minutes with this special person, the chances of them seeing us as anything other than an admiring fan are slim to none. It’s difficult enough to date non-celebrities in our section of the world; are people even thinking of the challenges that come with dating someone in the spotlight with an incredibly busy schedule who has adoring fans willing to throw themselves at them around every corner?
There is a sizable difference between having an innocent crush on a famous person and having an obsession that consumes more of your life than it has a right to. If you are so caught up in the life of a celebrity that their love life has the power to anger you, upset you, or bring you honest joy, what hope do you possibly have of obtaining and maintaining a real relationship, romantic or otherwise? How will you handle your ex falling in love with someone else or your best friend finding love while you’re still spending nights alone? How can you have a healthy and balanced life when you’re so invested in the lives of others?
The curiosity is fine; it’s normal and expected to have some wonder about the pairing of Kim Kardashian with the off-the-wall Kanye West. It’s a whole other to hate Kim and wish harm upon her because you believe Kanye can do better or you’d like him for yourself. Pangs of jealousy are normal as well; it’s fine to wish you could trade places with someone for a day so you could experience life with the person you have your eye on. However, when this jealousy consumes you, it becomes extremely unhealthy and can be quite dangerous, as can be seen from stalkers who land themselves in the news and from over-the-top websites run by rabid fans.
This fascination with the personal lives of celebrities is the reason quite a few people are still in business (gossip columnists, photogs, etc.) and the higher our demand gets, the more useless information will be quickly obtained and pumped out. It’s not that I wish these people out of jobs, as the information itself isn’t harmful. I just wish people would use this information a tad more responsibly. Whether or not Justin Bieber broke things off with Selena Gomez should not be a topic that is weighing heavily on your mind, holding the ability to affect your mood, whether your day is good or bad, or whether or not you should carry hope in your heart. It does not matter.
Spending time on celebrity gossip, like everything else in life, requires balance and must be prioritized properly. It should be close to last on your list of important things in your life. It should not take up bucketloads of your time. It should not escalate to the point where you are attacking someone’s girlfriend on Twitter because their boyfriend is YOURS and NO ONE ELSE CAN HAVE HIM!!! It should be something you take in, ponder or discuss briefly, and then put out of your mind and move on with your day and your life. It’s better to waste time on activities that you can own and call personal, private and loved instead of wasting time thinking and stressing about a life that has never and probably will never come close to touching your own.